Talking Smack – WWE Smackdown Live – 26th June 2018

Smackdown Live 26 06

We’re still on a run of decent Smackdowns. I thought this week’s Raw was decent but I seem to be in a minority on that one. Can Smackdown deliver the goods? Let’s find out.

 

Bludgeon Bryan

We opened up Smackdown Live with an episode of the award winning Miz TV (Mizzies count, right?). This week’s guests were the Bludgeon Brothers who Miz compared to dinosaurs for some reason. Miz asked the big green machines why they attacked Daniel Bryan last week. He then proceeds to make it into a movie:

Miz tells Harper & Rowan that they all proved how easy it was to dismantle Daniel Bryan on SmackDown LIVE last week.

But… my hand is down. Why are their mouth’s shut?

Act 1: Daniel is all happy with Renee, living his regular Daniel life.

Act 2: Daniel enters a terrifying world and interrupts the Bludgeon Brothers, he’s a glory hound according to Miz

Plot Twist: Daniel is actually the villain (I bet Marty Scurll would have something to say about that)

Act 3: The big bad heroes conquer the evil small Daniel Bryan.

Miz says it’s almost as if BB are auditing to be new Miztourage. Says there aren’t any openings at the moment but offers them spots as grips on “Ruff Ruff Ref”. BB are about to attack Miz when D Bry’s music hits. Miz says that Daniel is trying to steal BB’s spotlight again. Daniel tells Miz to shut up. He’s not afraid of them or The Miz who is hiding behind them. He’s not asking if they will fight him, asking which of them will fight him first. Harper accepts the challenge.

Hell Yes?

Daniel Bryan vs Harper (no known first name) is our main event. To prepare of the match, Harper stares into a camera while Daniel shadowboxes with Luke Gallows while Karl Anderson counts his abs.

WWE Photo

Daniel: “AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!” Harper: “AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!” Ref: “I’m strong to the finish, ’cause I eats me Spinach, I’m Popeye the sailor man!”

The match itself is pretty good. Daniel worked Harper’s left arm throughout (in between being Bludgeoned) and eventually locked in the Yes lock. Rowan then interfered to break it up causing the DQ. The Brothers of Bludgeoning then started beating on Daniel before…….

That… That’s gotta be Kane… That’s gotta be Kane.

Kane takes a break from running for mayor of Knox County (the election isn’t finished until November) and saves his old teammate. They fight off the Bludgeon Brothers together and then hug it out. Team Hell No are back together again. Dr Shelby would be proud. Paige comes out and lets them know that Team Hell No will get a Tag Team title match at Extreme Rules. Sure she’s throwing title matches away.

 

It’s inSAnitY Jeff

We were supposed to be getting Nakamura vs Jeff Hardy tonight on Smackdown for the US title but apparently Nakamura got bitten by a Police dog at the house show the night before so was taken out of the match. Instead we are got a US Title Open Challenge. So who answered this challenge you may ask? Why it was Eric Young of SAnitY.

After SAnitY’s entrance had all the epileptics watching rolling on the floor, Eric Young and Jeff had a short enough match. There was a pretty bad Twist of Fate botch that “didn’t get all of it” and the feed also broke during the match. Not sure if this was for everyone or just the one I was watching. After a bit, the Usos came out and got into a brawl with SAnitY causing the DQ. They were loving their DQ finishes this week. Shockingly we came back from break to a 6 man tag match. This was pretty fun. It took 4 superkicks to take down Dain. Jeff pinned Wolfe after a Swanton Bomb for the win.

Jeff looking like a perfectly clean and sober person right here. Nope, no relapses. None at all. Perfectly fine.

It’s interesting that they had SAnitY lose their first match as a team (even though Young technically won the first one). This leads me to hope they will win the feud with the Usos in the end though. Tis but a fool’s hope.

 

Ellsworthy

We had a whole James Ellsworth segment and he is so much better on the mic than I remembered. Ellsworth also has new music. It sounds like they actually made it instead of finding it on the free section of Youtube audio. He says that Asuka attacked him for no reason. It’s a man’s world and when you mess with the bull, you get the horns. He loves and respects women. He has a love life so hot, you can fry an egg on it. Oh god, images, no.

Ellsworth wasn’t ready for Asuka last week but he’s ready this week. He dares her to try it again. He takes off his shirt and we get a “put your shirt on” chant. In fairness, he has toned up a bit from his last run. It’s more of a banana shaped belly than an orange.

Suck in the gut. Keep sucking. Keep sucking. No Paige, different type of sucking.

Paige makes her way out and says that Asuka isn’t here, she’s with her family in Japan. That’s the only reason he is out here calling her out. Paige makes Carmella vs Asuka at Extreme Rules for the Women’s title. Before she can leave, Ellsworth says he knows why she’s really here. Paige is here to ask him on a date. She says sure, next Tuesday. But not a date, a match. And not with her, with Asuka. Intergender wrestling is back in the WWE.

Bonus Ellsworth bit: Ellsworth was in the back wearing an Asuka mask. Tye Dillinger came up to him and he took off the mask. Tye put it back on and says “Now you’re a 10”. After some discussion, it is decided that without a mask, he’s a 1.

 

IT’S FLIPSY

I’m not sure if you were aware but this show was sponsored by Sonic…

Who have a $3.99 crispy tender dinner…

Which is so flavourful and tender…

It’s Flipsy.

What the fuck does that mean? And why the fuck was it said 5 times during the course of Smackdown?

 

Smacking the Other Bits Up

  • We got an Andrade `Cien` Almas and Zelina Vega selfie promo. They mention that they took out Sin Cara and everyone has been scared to cross them since. That’s because you haven’t been seen since (including the actual match he were supposed to have against Sin Cara).  All Almas has had is 2 matches against local guys. Why did they bring him up if they aren’t going to use him?
WWE Photo

I am a Real Bulgarian, fight for the rights of Ai..den… I’m a real Bulgarian, Hip hip hooray, It’s Rusev Day

  • Xavier Woods took on Rusev in a fun match featuring pancakes, blended pancakes & speech bubbles. Rusev picked up the win with a Machka Kick and the Accolade. After the match, Rusev said that at Extreme Rules, he would be breaking the door down to AJ’s house, taking the title and it’s going to be a great Rusev Day.
More Bits
  • Naomi and Lana were still arguing about the danceoff from a few weeks ago. The cast of Netflix’s show G.L.O.W. then showed up and said that they all Feel the Glow. Cause it’s the name of their show. And Naomi’s catchphrase. Geddit? Annie’s boobs (not the monkey [let’s see who gets that reference]) goes into her Russian character from the show and Lana isn’t impressed. Lana speaks Russian at her.  The Glow girls think they should be working together. Naomi said that Lana be tripping. But Lana no trip. She did not fall once. If they get on same page, they could be ravishing together and everyone could feel the Glow. They hug. We have a new female tag team??? G.L.O.W. Season 2 premieres this Friday on Netflix.

I wonder if they do Arm flavoured Quinoa?

  • Becky Lynch’s rise continued when she “knocked off” Sonya Deville in a match. Buildup to the match had Becky training in the back with headphones on when a stagehand tried to let her know she’s up next and she nearly decked him. We also saw an clip from earlier today where she told Sonya and Mandy ” I see 4 arms in front of me so which would you like me to break tonight?” Great stuff from Becky. In the match, Mandy tried to interfere so Becky threw Sonya into Mandy before tapping Sonya out in the Dis-Arm-Her.

 

Smackdown Synopsis

Decent show but with some notable absences. We didn’t see the WWE champion or the Smackdown Women’s champion on the show. Also no Asuka, Charlotte. No sign of The Bar for weeks now. But it does mean that they have started giving some other people storylines and SAnitY have finally made their debut. Adding Team Hell No into an already pretty crowded Smackdown tag title picture is a little strange too although I expect this to be a shortlived thing. Nice feelgood moment to see them back together again though. If they don’t get Dr. Shelby in a bit with them, it’s all for nothing.

 

Match Results

Rusev def. Xavier Woods by submission
Eric Young def. Jeff Hardy by DQ
Jeff Hardy & The Usos def. SAnitY by pinfall
Becky Lynch def. Sonya Deville by submission
Daniel Bryan def. Harper by DQ

 

The Alleged Wrestling Podcast

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While you’re here, make sure to check out ‘The Alleged Wrestling Podcast’ where we have the craic looking back over the wrestling events of the past week! (It’s also on iTunes and Stitcher and all those nice things)

 

 

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About the Author: Nicky Bowe - Junior Executive Vice President of that feeling you get when you are walking alone at night and you're sure there's someone there. Nicky loves Wrestling, Video Games, Batman, General Nerdy Stuff, Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain. He likes DDP Yoga and having half a brain. Quite fond of making love at midnight, doesn't need to be in the dune of a cape. If he's the author you are looking for, write to him and escape.

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