Fortnite and Smash Bros Ultimate But No Mario Maker at Nintendo Direct E3 2018??

This evening Nintendo rounded out the platform holder portion of this year’s E3 with a somewhat strong showing. We had a lot of indie titles revealed, and some DLC news before an extended look at Smash Bros dominated the show. Killer Queen Black was the biggest surprise for me, that game looks amazing, I’m delighted to see it come to Switch.

Daemon X Machina Looks Crazy

Metal! Mechs! Machine Guns! Daemon X Machina opened the Direct by kicking you in the teeth, check it out!

Its all very Japanese and wonderful. Also, Metal.

Super Mario Party

Early in the show we were given a quick look at the upcoming Super Mario Party. This has long been rumoured so it was no surprise to see it here. It’s the typical Mario Party fare, advertised by the most unnatural group of people they could possibly find.

There is a feature where if you link two Switch consoles together they will interact the the play space on screen will adapt to your needs. Nintendo don’t make hardware for software, they make software for hardware so you can always bet on a gimmick here and there. Mario Party is set for release on Oct 5th.

Fortnite Drops By

Fortnite, pictured above, slamming Andre The Giant at Wrestlemania III

Well…it was going to happen sooner or later, right? If you’ve been living under a rock for the last six months you might not be aware of the sheer cultural phenomenon that is Fortnite Battle Royale (or Shit PUBG as I like to call it).

Fortnite Battle Royale, which is a free game, is raking in money hand over fist by selling boatloads of their in game currency to the deluded youth of 2018. Nintendo Switch might have been the only product with a screen and a WiFi connection that did not have Fortnite but Nintendo have rectified that…and it was made available to download almost right away. Pretty cool to see Nintendo noticing what is going on in the world!

Super Smash Bros Ultimate

The E3 2018 Direct was essentially the Super Smash Bros Ultimate Direct. SSBU took up 25 minutes of a 42 minute presentation but it was worth it. The new title will feature every single character that has ever been in a Smash Bros game! You will have to unlock them by playing the game (novel, that) but every single cast member is there, even if they only appeared once in a Smash game. My boy Solid Snake returns! We have to wait until Dec 7th though…boo.

Basically this is the Smash Bros game of your dreams. Nintendo went into great depth about the changes and updates to characters. Some have new moves while others have been updated to represent their most recent form. Link is the Breath of The Wild version and Mario has Cappy from his trip around the world last October.

Mario had a few costumes, including one that set me right off…

WHERE THE F%*K IS MARIO MAKER???!

Do you think it’s funny to show Mario in his Super Mario Maker construction gear and then NOT announce a Mario Maker port for Switch?

Nintendo have ported over crappy Wii U games by the bucket load but the jewel in the crown sits on the shelf?? Captain f&*king Toad’s Treasure Tracker is coming to Switch and you leave Mario Maker out in the cold? Are you f&*king kidding me? Again?!

This is starting to look less like negligence and more like a personal attack on me. This is no simple oversight, it’s a declaration of war. Nintendo like to have one first party release per month on this successful run the Switch has been on.

December – Super Smash Bros Ultimate

November – Lets Go Pokemon

October – Super Mario Party

September – Xenoblade Chronicles 2 DLC…Are you on drugs?!!

There was September, going about its business and looking perfect for a Mario Maker release. You give it a nice long run into Christmas to eat up sales. Mario Party won’t set the world alight but Pokemon and Smash will fly off the shelves, Mario Maker was perfect for that slot. Sure, they think they have their bases covered with those two behemoths and they don’t need another game. I get that, but what about those of us who have no interest in Pokemon? We have to wait until Dec 7th to play something on Switch?! We have to wait another year for Mario Maker???! F&*k you.

You f&*king monsters. A bag of dicks for you to dine on wouldn’t be enough for this betrayal.

EAT A GALAXY OF DICKS, YOU ABSOLUTE BASTARDS!

*Goes for a cry*

In all seriousness though, the Switch is crying out for a 2D Mario game…get it done FFS.

Steven Murphy
2Bit Sports Co-Founder. Junior Vice President of Corporate Affairs, Creative, Live Events but also Third floor Janitor. Gaming Editor, Manchester United loudmouth. Whatever I am actually employed to do I probably did it earlier. It's on your desk, I'd say. Its safe to say that I call 'em as I see 'em. Be warned, I hate a lot of things. It's easier to count the things that I do like. I probably hate you.

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