The Players Manchester United Must Sell

Manchester United

There’s no shame in losing a match but Manchester United were embarrassingly bad this weekend. United lost away to Newcastle on Sunday afternoon, this was the first time the home side have won a league game at St James’ Park since October 2017.

United looked completely clueless all over the pitch. The players look disinterested and disjointed. They play like a group of guys who have never played together. The side BADLY needs a leader in there and the deadwood needs to be cleared out. It’s time.

Jose Mourinho himself might get his p45 if things do not improve. His gutless performances are adding up. United are awful to watch, start the clear out if you want to see out your new deal.

OUT – Chris Smalling

Do I need to even explain this one? If you have missed the last 5 years of Smalling’s career at United just watch the Newcastle game today. Smalling needlessly climbed an a defender which led to Lukaku’s goal being ruled out. He made a tackle on Gayle in the first half that should have led to a penalty, the ref spared us. Smalling cannot sort his feet out.

Then, late in the game, Smalling decided to dive in the middle of the park, perhaps expecting contact (that never came) from Shelvey. He was booked for his trouble. The resulting free kick led to the winning goal. Smalling as usual was ball watching, not seeing the danger.

Smalling has been playing for Manchester United for eight years. End this.

OUT – Phil Jones

I could just copy/paste the above and reference last week’s horror show away to Spurs.

Phil Jones has zero composure. If you think Smalling has no awareness and is a ball watcher then our mate Phil can only be likened to a dog running after a ball in the park. He sees a ball, puts on his Phil Face and runs at it full force no matter the consequences to his body or the scoreline. Jones has been at the club for seven years. Out the gate with you, face first.

OUT – Fellaini

He doesn’t even warrant a full paragraph or his full name being used. This clown is everything wrong with United in the Post-Fergie Post-League Titles era. He has no business playing for Manchester United. He looks like a competition winner running around the scared turf of Old Trafford. Down the tunnel and out the gate.

OUT – Marcus Rojo

Another player stealing a living at Manchester United. Rojo has consistently proven that he cannot be trusted…in multiple positions. He is taking up a spot in the squad, stopping new players coming in or young players being promoted to the first team squad because Jose has his numbers in defence. He will never be anything more than a very poor squad player. Move him on.

OUT – Daley Blind

I had high hopes for Blind when he signed in Louis Van Gaal’s first season. We needed that defensive midfield player to finally remove Carrick from the team. It started very well but it wasn’t long until he was shoved into defensive positions that he isn’t cut out for.

Blind continues to take corners despite never being able to clear the first man. He is a classic case of a limited player getting a move after a good World Cup. Out the door with you, Fabien Barthez says hello.

OUT – Matteo Darmian

Useless. Out the gate. The only thing that may spare him is being backup to Antonio Valencia on the right side of defence but I would rather see a youth player get a chance. You’ll get the same amount of mistakes at first but at least you know a youth team player will learn from them.

OUT – Ashley Young

I have no idea how Young has managed to stay at the club this long. Young is inexplicably keeping Luke Shaw out of the team. That alone should be enough of a reason to at least see him on the bench.

Ashley Young should be nowhere near the Manchester United starting eleven in 2018. His stock seems to be amazingly high at the moment. Sell during the swell.

Defensive numbers

The above sales would decimate the squad in terms of defensive numbers. Our defensive record isn’t the worst by any means but those stats are misleading. David De Gea has saved United’s bacon on countless occasions. If it wasn’t for a “faulty fax machine” who knows where United would be.

Jose’s whole focus is on defending and stopping other teams. The low level defenders we have will never change Jose’s approach on the pitch. He knows he doesn’t have a John Terry and Ricardo Carvalho failsafe partnership at the back. He has Smalling and Jones, the Nickelodeon alternative to Terry/Carvalho.

If I was in charge of transfers at United this summer my number one priority would be at the back. I might keep some of the above like Young and Blind just to have on the bench but the entire area needs to be overhauled. If Jose has less clowns at the back it will undoubtedly have an impact further up the park.

In closing, Anthony Martial is not a fucking left back!

Steven Murphy
2Bit Sports Co-Founder. Junior Vice President of Corporate Affairs, Creative, Live Events but also Third floor Janitor. Gaming Editor, Manchester United loudmouth. Whatever I am actually employed to do I probably did it earlier. It's on your desk, I'd say. Its safe to say that I call 'em as I see 'em. Be warned, I hate a lot of things. It's easier to count the things that I do like. I probably hate you.

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